The Retrospective

Sunny, 28, bit cloudy yet low humid, just like me,
Still, the cold breeze over the lake gives me chills.
I can see the old bench I was sitting an hour ago,
Standing strong over the sun like a true hero.

There is a dude lying on the grass at 7’O clock,
Enjoying is cold beer as if he found his treasure.
There is a young couple afar, around 11’O clock,
Enjoying the warmth of not just the burning sun.

Then there is an old couple, cycling uphills with a grin,
Must be in the 60s, yet probably stronger than many.
This old lady in 70s walking two cute and fancy dogs,
Reminds me of my adopted, not this fancy, but so lovely.

There are crows all around, but they’re very well behaved.
Definitely not like “Crows in Colombo”, they even sound different.
Some fly over me, and I pray that they won’t shit on me.
There is a crow couple, feeding each other, still black and ugly.

There are two nice ladies, probably in their later 30s,
Lying under a big tree and oh damn, they just kissed.
Oh my god, such a shame, ruining the culture of 2,500…
Oh wait, it’s the Netherlands and there are less stupid.

I already have my expensive headphones on,
Yet it plays the same old barely-updated playlist,
Which I’ve been listening all over since… Forever.
But, each reminds me of various phases of my life.

Some come in, and I unconsciously skip but never delete.
I always wonder why and how I have One Direction here.
Some remind me of emotions, people and struggles.
Some take me a different timeline and make me wonder.

“I’ve become so numb”, “Pain” and “In the end”,
“Animal I have become” and even “Lips of an Angel”
“Lost in you”, “Life without Grace” and “Reason”
Later “Ae Dil Hai Mushkhil” and ” Channa Mere Aa”

This Sun wouldn’t let me be at peace, burning me again.
Or I was stupid enough to sit under a temporary shade,
I looked around with extra effort, to find a more stable shade.
There is one, under a big tree, no bench though, just grass.

I took a moment to rethink everything happened in my life.
All the sorrows and heartbreaks, the challenges and failures.
Endless worries, bogus, rejections, insults, and criticisms.
It’s just like a Bollywood movie, except everything is real.

Here I am, lying on the grass on a sunny day of Summer,
‘Cause I have some hours left to my bus back to Germany.
Retrospecting my past and projecting my near future,
Listening to Never Looking Back and oh! the irony.

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